Not if they’re watching or listening. Otherwise I can’t go.

Lotta green on that burger, buddy. Cocks shotgun

Though Shasta is nice this time of year.

Okay, but like… can I see it?

Jesus, I hope I’m the only reason…

You can use it for gravel as well. I walked into a quarry recently and pretended to fall into a pile of loose gravel (but then I started covertly shoveling it into my fanny pack).

Boom. Close the zipper on that lock box while some production employees help you out of the gravel and you’ve secured 1/8500th of what you need for your new driveway. You just have to pull the grift a few more times.

They know my face at the local quarry now, though, which is problematic.

Yeah, but like, the jalapenos and cheese don’t just fit in the fanny pack after all the flour is in there. It’s rough getting by these days.

Much easier for shoplifting, yeah. Just stick a knife in the bag and inconspicuously drain it into your fanny pack while pretending to browse other baking items. Walk on out and you’ve got 1.5 lb of that all-purpose grain glitter and no one is the wiser.

Dad?

Sometimes big life decisions come easy. Sometimes small life decisions come hard (no double entendre intended). As long as they’re both on the same page when it comes to commitment, hopefully the concerns you mentioned don’t apply to them and we can feel happy about it as a third-party spectator.

This is my platform when I run for public office.

I mean… maybe we’re depressed because of the crushing weight of the real world impacts of what’s being reported on. I absolutely believe that consuming dour media can affect your mood. Plenty of evidence. I’ve also had two friends die of poverty due to their incapability to afford medical expenses.

Then where do I come from? I hope you’re misinterpreting my sentiment, because I feel like we’re on the same page.

It might feel pretty dire, but all of this information is critical to understanding and empathizing with the people you might meet in your own society. You can opt out of forums (and should if it’s causing you distress). I wouldn’t suffer a buffer from the negative information if it meant a lack of information in general.

Can I just respond to this with the entire lyrics for The Logical Song by Supertramp?

Who doesn’t want to leave a sparkly, effervescent corpse after dying of asphyxiation and painful organ failure due to excessive carbonic acid buildup?

I’ll have the brain bullet, thanks.

I appreciate the quantification.

So is the Likert, but I bet you anyone trying hard enough can get gayer.

It’s the quantum gay that we really have to measure, but I can’t pin its velocity for some reason.

Yeah, I can see a place smelling like a public swimming pool being off-putting. 10% bleach is really common across the food industry, though. Making bread, jerky, kombucha, and various grains, each facility had the same bleach concentration for cleaning (among other cleaning and sanitizing solutions).