This looks like 5 different houses in the photos. Crazy.

Don’t overlook those sinks - they’re weird. I was very disappointed by the toilets though, very functional. Luckily you get to scroll past an actual pulpit first.

I was not expecting the rest of the house to be like it was. I really liked the Mondrian inspired kitchen and the bathroom sink was actually pretty cool. The whole house just feels so disjointed though, nothing cohesive.

They’re denying you a raise or a job so that they can live like this. Remember that.

When I was like, 2, I had one of those “See and say” toys, you pull the cord on the side, the arrow spins, it lands on a picture and says something relevant to that picture. If I understand right, at least at the time these had a kind of phonograph record in them with several concentric tracks, so where the arrow came to rest is where the phonograph would start playing. Mine was about nursery rhymes. It developed a skip in the track about the woman in the shoe, so it started to say “There was an old woman who lived in- Oh My.” Because it would either skip to the end of that track or to an adjacent one that ended that way. And the exact way it said that has been seared into my head meat for 35 years.

Is that a shower in the pulpit? Lol

Also, either they pulled a sheet over the bed without a mattress or someone likes sleeping on the rack…

Do you think the realtors who sell these properties, when they learn of the place, go “ah fuck” or get excited?