• dazedandconfused@lemmynsfw.com
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    1 year ago

    Just ask first 🙂 don’t go all “no one expects the Spanish inquisition!”

    Issue I’ve run into is partners don’t realize they need lube to do that. Spit kinda works but not really.

    You can even just play with the hole and not put anything in and it’ll feel nice.

    • JayJay@lemmynsfw.comOP
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      1 year ago

      Hopefully it is clear that you should ask and communicate. 😀 With a little lubricant it is definitely easier and more fun. If I do it myself while jerking off, then the finger goes in quite well without lubricant, but if the woman does it, please do so with a little moisture. Playing at the hole is also very exciting and you don’t always have to push something in.

  • ChocoboRocket@lemmy.world
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    1 year ago

    Tried both, I generally prefer on the butthole than in the butthole

    But I haven’t tried every toy or every combination of butt + sex stuff either!

    As always, with life and sex, open, honest, clear, communication is the key to satisfaction

    • JayJay@lemmynsfw.comOP
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      1 year ago

      both are great and very exciting. It always depends on the mood and who you are having sex with.

      I had only tried a rather small dildo so far and that was nice.

      you are definitely right. Communication is incredibly important and can make everything easier and better.

  • K.K.@lemmynsfw.com
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    1 year ago

    2 thoughts here:

    1. During penetrative sex, eh. Honestly, it makes it tough for me to stay hard (despite it feeling good)
    2. It can never be a surprise for me. Being clean is a hard rule, so spontaneous butt stuff is a no.
    • JayJay@lemmynsfw.comOP
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      1 year ago

      It makes me even harder during sex, so I’m lucky. You really can’t always do it spontaneously.

  • loopedcandle@lemmynsfw.com
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    1 year ago

    Yes. Achieved the illusive p-orgasm once. But it’s super hard to do and I’ve been on the hunt for it ever since.

  • HelixDab2@lemm.ee
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    1 year ago

    No. I’ve tried prostate massage, and it does absolutely nothing for me. It’s not painful, but it’s also not enjoyable; it mostly just feels mildly awkward. I genuinely do not see what gay men get out of it on the receiving end.

    The idea that all men likes it, and men that don’t like it just haven’t tried it correctly yet is just… Dumb. Like, it’s a level of stupid that’s on the order of insisting that lesbians just haven’t had the right dick yet.

  • Anatares@lemmynsfw.com
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    1 year ago

    Yes with proper lubrication. Just playing around with the finger tip is amazing! A plug can also be great. Past a few inches you’re nearing “train for it” territory and it may start to be uncomfortable or painful. Everyone needs to learn their body and its limits ofc.

  • lazyneet@programming.dev
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    1 year ago

    I like it. I finger myself sometimes. The last time I tried it with my previous partner, I gave her a pair of thick rubber kitchen gloves so her manicured nails wouldn’t be a hygiene issue. She used oil-based lube and stuck a couple fingers in. It didn’t feel great, but I would have preferred she continue rather than stopping at the slightest sign of discomfort. Pain and nonconsent are my kinks, but I’ve accepted that few people are true sadists.

    I haven’t had as many male partners, nor have my male relationships lasted as long. It’s not that I don’t like guys, but my type is more effeminate and cute while still dominant. Very, very few people like that in the world.